Jan 302014
 

We’d planned to leave my hotel three hours before the flight, allowing up to an hour to get to the airport, and wanting to be there two hours early since we’d already checked in online. The taxi driver from the night before told Jordan he “didn’t start work” that early, but would 2.5 hours work? Eh, it would be close, but good enough. Jordan showed up at my hotel a little in advance…and we waited…and waited. We were down to 2:15 before flight time and started to panic. The hotel doormen were completely non-phased, and called their taxi contacts. See, you can’t just flag down a taxi in Luanda, because they largely don’t exist.

Eventually, just about 1:45 until flight time, a taxi showed up that the doorman had called, and he wanted $50 to go to the airport. Sigh, no choice at this point, and we paid…and he made fast time of it, getting us there maybe 75 minutes before the flight, and 15 minutes before luggage cutoff.

The problem? The business class line was over 10 people deep once we finally found it (since it was unmarked) and we waited. Eventually I started pressing the guy manning the line to let us to the front, because we were running out of time. He spoke passable English, and told us “no no, we must process all the Havana customers first, their flight is 90 minutes before yours!” Um, we were barely an hour before flight time, so Havana was 30 minutes late and not everyone was checked in.

Knowing never to trust the first thing a semi-official person tells you in Africa, I kept pressing him. Are you SURE you are right. He points to a long line of 100+ people in the terminal. “They all go to Sao Tome too in economy, not to worry.” In the end, he was right. We checked in about 45 minutes before flight time, and no problem at all.  We did get probably the most festive lounge invite I’ve ever gotten before:

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Security was next, and it was a big nonevent.  Well, except for nasty angry agents who made the TSA look pleasant.  They were yelling at passengers who didn’t know the procedure, and being generally rude and condescending to them.  Then, it was time for exit immigration.  They had a bit of a hard time finding my entry stamp, then when they did they seemed surprised by Cabinda, but it was no big deal and got stamped out without a problem.

Then, on the other side of immigration is where the fun started.  There was a room with a closed door, and a long line leading into it.  I ignored it and tried to head up to the lounge.  Nope, was told I had to stand in line.  What goes on in that room?  They bring people in one by one, and search their luggage for cash.   Since they “forget” to remind you to declare money when you enter Angola, of course, any money you have is undeclared…and subject to confiscation.  The Chinese guy in front of me told me that his first time in Angola he lost nearly $2000 this way.  OUCH.  The line was getting too long for the room, and the security goons were at a loss where to put the people who were clearing immigration.  They picked the two big white guys and said “YOU GO” and pointed to the escalator.  Score!  I’d already well-hidden my cash since I’d been warned about this online, but it was nice to not be subjected to it.  I guess their logic was that we were more likely to either be onto their scam, or put up a fight, so they let us go?

Up the stairs, and into the TAAG lounge to wait.  They said they’d call our flight since it was (obviously) late, so we had time to relax a slight bit:

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Jan 292014
 

Taxi only took about 30 minutes from the airport, and arrived at my hotel, the Epic Sana Luanda, around 10:30am. The hotel had plenty of rooms available, but wanted to charge a half day to check in early. They told me to come back at noon and “maybe” I could check in then with no charge. I stored my bags with the valet, and asked to see a manager about an exception. They ran around for about 20 minutes trying to figure out how to handle someone who challenged their “no” and eventually, one of the front desk guys told the other guy to just let me check in…victory…and he also apologized and offered a room on the top floor. Score!

Originally, I was torn about booking this hotel. Hotels in Luanda are insanely expensive, but after my less-than-happy evening in Cabinda I figured for one night I could afford to splurge. At $495 a night, the Epic Sana was definitely a splurge!  Got up to the room, which was nice and comfortable and had great views of Luanda looking out onto the waterfront and corniche, where I’d walk later:

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Jordan had gone to check into his hotel, so once I settled in I went across the street to a small market to get some drinks and water, and then set out in search of lunch.  I couldn’t really find anything enticing in the immediate area, so settled for the hotel’s third floor rooftop/pool restaurant.  The menu came….and the Luanda sticker shock set in again.  If I was considering champagne, I had another guess coming!  The prices were stratospheric! Continue reading »

Jan 282014
 

Having survived the night, it was time to head to the airport to fly down to Angola’s capital, Luanda. The problem is, there are only like 40 taxis in all of Cabinda, and despite the hotel front desk guy promising over and over that one was on the way, for 30 minutes there was no sign.

Of course, there were plenty of share taxis puttering by in the street, and eventually Jordan and I made the decision to chance one. We had the front desk guy flag one down, negotiated a good price…and we were off. Until….BANG!

This wasn’t just a flat tire, it was an absolute blowout. We’d agreed on approx $5 to the airport, so after realizing this car was going nowhere fast, and the driver seemed completely unphased by it, we used him to flag down another taxi to go the rest of the way. It already had three people in the little car (think sub-compact) but in went these two large American guys, two large bags, AND smaller bags. I think we were all sitting on each other, absolutely packed in, three african women, two large american guys, a few chimpanzees, a goat or two, a flock of chicken, and a couple of elderly cattle. Hmmmm, I might be imagining the cattle…but it sure felt like it. This was no luxury sedan, but about 10 minutes later we did make it to the airport, for the princely sum of $1 each. To be fair, we did give a little money to the guy with the blown-out tire – he’d definitely need it for repairs.

Having made it to the airport, the task was to find the check-in counter. Which was way more difficult than it sounded. There were four counters that LOOKED like check-in counters, but no lines, just a swarm of people around them. We just started wildly waving our arms around and saying TAAG? Luanda? Sim? Eventually, we were pointed by different people to each of the four different counters…so I tried a new tactic. Executiva? Business Class? That seemed to work, and someone pointed us to a lady at one of the counters.

She looked at us…looked at our passports…and said in all seriousness: “Why did you not check-in LAST NIGHT.” Excuse me? We have to check in the night before, are you serious? She was, indeed, serious, and pointed to a sign on the counter, that either said “please give me a $100 bill if you want helpful service” or “please check in two hours in advance, for passengers on the first flight of the day, check-in is the night before.” I couldn’t be sure – I don’t read Portuguese.

Having decided she’d not be making any bribes off us today, she asked for our tickets. “E-tickets…in computer” – “No. I need a printed copy. Go to TAAG office OUTSIDE AIRPORT and get a printed receipt.” Seriously? You refuse to look it up, and we have to go outside and around the corner to another guy with the same computer, who will look it up, and print us a receipt? Ugh. To the office…and the same question “why didn’t you check in last night?” Um, I’ve been to over 150 countries, and have never heard this “check in the day before concept.” Angola, you’re truly unique.

He did, however, print us very nice receipts, which we took back to lady #1, and she was kind enough to check us in. Security was…a complete joke. I’m pretty sure the x-ray machine wasn’t working, and people were walking through with the body scanner beeping like R2D2 in a moment of excitement. Anyways, we made it to the waiting lounge…which was packed.

Right when we were supposed to be departing…we saw the plane come in.  About 20 minutes later a TAAG person appeared, which apparently meant “every man for himself” and everyone started swarming the boarding door.  We’ve had enough African experience to know that if you don’t do your share of shoving, you might as well wait until everyone has passed, so….shove we did and we managed to get out the door.  We were overheard by a couple that noted it was our first time in Angola, and said they’d been there something like 10+ years.  They had the missionary or NGO look to them….and I give them a lot of credit.  Angola’s certainly not for the timid!

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Queuing to board:

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Misc military stuff on the tarmac:

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